We need to talk!

Marriage is hard work, it is not for the faint at heart. After the cake is gone, after the flowers have been pressed in a book, after the limo ride home you have to figure out how to live with that someone. 
All the dating rules are no longer valid, you are no longer dating, you are married. If you and your spouse did not have some hard conversations prior to the “I do”, it’s going to be real hard. 

Money? How is it going to be handled? Who pays the bills? Who is the responsible party for this? Do we keep our money separate? Is there a disparity in income and I will always be broke and you will be balling? This creates more problems than infidelity. Real talk

Kids? Yours mine and ours? Are we in agreement on how to raise them? Do we share parenting goals? Do we have parents not in the home that need to be considered? Do you tell me I can’t talk to your sons mother and you can’t talk to my daughters dad? Do we all come together for the benefit of our children? Spend a lot of time on this one, it can destroy your marriage. 

Work? Do you believe women should work and I think they shouldn’t? That can create a problem. Each one should understand the plan for the family and the plan to execute it.

Household expectations, how do we divide the work? Does he want a home cooked meal everyday but you don’t cook? Do you think he should keep your car washed and gas in it but his momma did it and he thinks you should? 

Who does laundry, mows the lawn and does dishes? Who pick up the dry cleaning? Having misaligned expectations create unnecessary havoc in a new relationship. These things don’t get talked about because all you can think of is your dress, flowers and cake. 

Church? Which one are we attending yours or mines, do I expect you to go? Do you expect me to, because I only go on Christmas and Easter and maybe Mother’s Day.  

How are we going to interact with our families? Do we spend every Sunday at your moms house? What about holidays my family want to se me too? 

No matter how long you’ve dated or how long you’ve known one another that ring brings about new expectations. Trust me! 

If you already got married and it is struggling, go back to the drawing board. Write out the issues and talk them through. Silence is not an option. 



Your masculinity defined her womanhood. 

The man in you called to the woman and set her free.

 The man in you called to the girl in her, he listened to her, hugged her close and allowed her to grow up, trusting that the man would not fail her. 

The man in you helped shaped the woman. You taught her to love unconditionally because you needed to be loved unconditionally.

The man in you taught her to forgive, because you caused so much pain in her life she needed to forgive you to move on. 
The man in you taught her to war for peace, because you created havoc in her world and only peace could heal her. 

The man in you taught her so much about life, loving and being a woman.  When it became time to define a role,  the man became a HUSBAND and his WIFE showed up. 

Beauty comes in every size

I receive a lot of emails, and the ones that always sadden me the most are from people who condemn themselves because of their weight. Because they condemn themselves and others have condemned them, they think that God must condemn them too.

“There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.”‭‭Romans‬ ‭8:1‬ ‭KJV‬‬ http://bible.com/1/rom.8.1.kjv

Nothing could be further from the truth! God is about restoration, not condemnation. He sees differently than human beings see. Think of it like x-ray vision. God can look right past your body, straight into your heart and mind. He sees all the invisible thoughts and behaviors that contributed to your physical results. And He has the ability to help you change them.

If you have been condemning yourself for your weight gain and generally being unforgiving to yourself then I believe it saddens God. Why? Because through His grace, He has set you free from garbage thinking. Continuing to put yourself down plays straight into the hands of the enemy.
The enemy wants you to be so condemned and discouraged that you get deeper into bondage. But sin no longer has dominion over you. The only power it has is that which you choose to give it.
Remember who your Father is. In your weight loss journey, think restoration not condemnation. Forgive yourself for your past; after all there is nothing you can do about it.
The body you have now is just a snapshot of the choices you made in the past. The choices you make now will determine the body in which you will live in the future. Keep going, don’t stop. 
Never forget this one thing

“I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭139:14‬ ‭KJV‬‬ http://bible.com/1/psa.139.14.kjv